Oh degree

Assalamualaikum,

Salam sayang. Masturah di sini.. Hari ini keputusan upu keluar. Pukul 12 jugak sibuk nak tekan. Dalam masa yang sama saya guna sms. And, dapat balas dari sms tadi. My first reaction like "Takkkkkk! Tak nak, rasa macam nak nangis!!". My mom pun like... "Kenapa? Kat Unisza ke?". Tak. UTHM. Ulangan suara.. UTHM. And Abang A ketawa.. seriously. Lepas tu saya cakap " Kenapa teknologi makanan, kerja kilang tu semua!". Nampak tak tak bersyukurnya aku masa tu. Mak saya ok jea. Dia kata dekat ngan rumah dan ofcoz abang A pun kat sana. 

Sejujurnya, saya pernah merasakan bahawa UTHM tak ada potensi seperti universiti-universiti yang lain. Saya sendiri lepas tu dapat masuk situ.. I was literally crying and cannot accept that for a second. But then, tiba-tiba ada suara hati membisikkan pelbagai perkara positif. Rumah ngan UTHM bukan jauh mana. So, setiap minggu boleh balik. Manalah tau kalau putus cinta ke boleh balik ngadu kat mak. Haha. Emm. Lagipun Teknologi makanan UTHM saya memang masukkan dalam list upu dan kos tu yang kesembilan saya letak. 

After banyak drama and btw period lagi (1st day kau!) , Saya terima dengan ikhlas in shaa Allah. What ever it takes! I will strive for my success! Walaupun dietetik yang diimpikan kian kecundang, I have FOOD TECHNOLOGY which is not bad for me.. Masih lagi mood seronok nak belajar. 

The funny thing is saya dah lama follow UTHM TROLL. Page yang meningkat naik ni dan tak sangka saya akan menjadi salah satu di antara pelajar di UTHM. But dari page tu jugak banyak benda yang saya dengar pasal U tu macam makanan tak bagus laa, MPP macam apa laa. Pengangkutan pun.. Mehhh.. Tu laa. Haha, IDK how I will react to be one of their student kat sana.. Rumah pun, Uitm PALAM masih tak boleh dikalahkan (Sebab haritu ikut hantar abang gi UTHM). I don't mean to be rude but still tak boleh kalahkan uitm PALAM. But in the positive side, abang A asek banggakan dengan perpustakaan UTHM dia tu..  And my sedara-mara pun banyak gak laa. Ofcoz sebab kampung I kat BP..

Oh ya.. lagi satu dan alasan memang I taknak pi sana..

Ex classmate SPM dulu dapat UTHM gak!! I mean bukan calang-calang ex classmate.. Dia dulu menaruh harapan kat saya. Then saya ni bukan layan pun. Dia siap luah perasaan bagai.. Masa tu lahh. But haritu reunion pun dia ada gak. Saya buat macam biasa jea.. And my ring tactic tu.. Waaa! Saya taknak dia fikir kita satu U kita memang ada jodoh. Now you understand kan? Huh. 

UTHM yes kat Johor jea. Well here nak kongsi apa yang akan saya belajar kalau saya amek teknologi makanan:

At the end of the day, walaupun UTHM ni masyarakat pandang tepi jea.. That's ok. Saya cuba sedaya upaya untuk buktikan walaupun saya belajar di situ, saya masih boleh berjaya. Saya ni kira bernasib baik dapat peluang melanjutkan pelajaran. Tak macam Abang U saya.. Kesian dia. Dia tak dapat memana.. Tapi I am sure that Allah have a better plan for him. Saya percaya Allah tempatkan saya kat sini adalah atas kebaikan saya sendiri. Kerja? Itu semua rezeki yang Allah akan beri. Walaupun suri rumah.. Tak salah kan? Wallahu'alam

Tambahkan manis dalam senyuman, kurangkan manis dalam makanan :)

Assalamualaikum,

Baru perasan tak ada langsung blog post bulan Julai. Hmm, nak update sikit pasal cuti yang terlampau panjang ni. Since saya dah berazam nak berjinak-jinak dalam bidang masakan.. So here we goes.

First thing first, saya masak asam pedas ikan salmon. Nampak tak fusion di situ? Kikiki. Manalah tertelan nak masak grilled salmon ataupun seared salmon. So yea. 

Yang ni versi goreng. See, kitorang tak fancy mana pun. Lainlah kalau My Abang A masak. Mine deep fry dia fry with teeny tiny oil. Lepas masak hidang dengan letak sikit parutan lemon. Btw, saya tak tau pun spices apa dia letak and it tasted pretty good and refreshing sebab ada lemon zest tu. So fancy!

My first red velvet! Saya mendapat gerak hati untuk buat kek ni lepas nana bagitau dia nak buat. Tq nana! And, serius saya suka kek ni. Gebu! Walaupun meraah dia tak menyala (pewarna merah dah habis at that time. Dapat cenonet jea)

Kue tiaw hailam!

Lontong dan sambal telur. Sebenarnya more to lodeh. Tapi makan dengan nasi impit instead of regular rice. But still, they pretty much the same.

Mashed patato dengan gravy

Sup ikan. Ikan apa ntah. But my mom said dia ada keturunan ikan merah jugak.

Sup daging.. Serve dengan periuk sekali. Hoho

Daging masak merah but without red food colouring. Musim nak dekat raya/raya memang susah nak cari pewarna merah. Out of stock jea. 

My absolute favourite! Kalau saya kelaparan malam-malam, sebab kadang-kadang malam tak masak.. So, inilah kombinasi makanan yang akan saya sediakan. French fries, Baked beans dan scrambled eggs. 

And that's wrap all my cooking story masa cuti ni. Saya tak berapa aktif memasak pada cuti ni sebab Abang A yang tersangat rajin masuk dapur. Nak bukak kafe katanya.. Kikiki. But yea.. Saya sokong. He has a high standard dalam bidang masakan. Semua bahan mesti ada. If not kena pi kedai sat. My style, tanya mak pastu rasa, rasa dan rasa. Saya tak suka ikut 100% resepi. Saya tengok pun secara kasar. Yang lain saya ubah dan tambah tu tambah ni. Dulu, masa mula-mula nak masak tu memang ikut jea resepi.. But tak semua orang ada cita rasa yang sama. At the end, saya buat cara saya sendiri.

Cerita pasal raya! Malam raya kami gerak Singapura sampai hari raya ketiga. Sampai rumah tengahari pastu malam gerak Batu Pahat. Haha kan.. Then balik raya ke-5. Since, kami beraya di Singapura.. Maka beruntunglah kami dari segi kutipan. Kikiki. Ya.. Memandangkan Ringgit Malaysia jatuh.. 

Harap tak terlambat untuk mengucapkan Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri! Maaf zahir dan batin :)

Ketakutan melumpuhkan saya

Assalamualaikum,

As stated in my older blog post, Saya dah ada lesen memandu.. Which is "keperluan" untuk setiap orang pada masa kini? Maybe. 

Well, semasa saya dalam lecture hall (mula-mula asasi 2014 dulu) saya lupa subjek apa.. And I got a call from my dad. I don't answered it because I was in that hall. So, I whatsapp-ed him and asked why he called me and I cannot answer it. Immediately he said that he wanted a photocopy of my IC and my licence and told me that he wanted to buy me a brand new car.. I'm like.. What?! Err, I'm not sure how to react. But yea.. It turns out that he bought me Perodua Viva S. 

Sejujurnya.. Driving is one of my biggest fear. I am thankful to have my licence, to have supports from my bro that helped me alot during my driving lesson. But still, it is my fear. My mind keep telling me I can't. That is the problem with anxiety. It pulled you out of most of the thing. In my life, I have a lot of fear. And this is one of them. And to be honest, I am sad about myself. People around me enjoying themselve, but why I can't be like them? I feel totally separated and isolated.

Abang A's, Abang U's and Masturah's. Triplet! 

This kinda mental illness can be cured which basically deal with that fear! As simple as that. You know what, I got my licence not a smooth process as they said.. Success is 99% failure! And yes. Maybe in my case is pretty uncommon which is I failed at very first of the process which is bumped me out! Ujian rabun warna? Who have thought that I am the one who failed that test. It burst me into tears. There was a long post that I wrote about it so yea. And people said I am weird.. T__T" I do, sometimes.. What I didn't told people yet is what makes me say No No to driving. 

So, saya pergi kelas praktikal saya seperti biasa. Saya memandu dalam litar. It went smooth at that time until.. one moment when I accidentally press the gas pedal. And it accelerates and hit the car infront of me. That was total shock for me. But at that time, I tried to managed the situation calmly with brake and tarik hand brake and I am glad that I can think with my brain instead of panicking. Basically my teacher positive but the others like.. bashed me with negativity.. Sementara menunggu pelajar lain.. saya imbas kembali kejadian tadi and that time, saya rasa I am a huge clumsy! Masa Kak Hawa hantar saya balik saya menangis.. Teringatkan betapa teruknya saya. She is an awesome teacher. She motivates me, she said "Kemanisan kejayaan itu akan lebih terserlah dengan kegagalan yang kita alami. Sampailah dengan dia selitkan surah dan keagamaan. Although kereta dia ada sedikit kecacatan akibat saya. But I have paid for what I have done to her car. Not that much tho.. Alhamdulillah. Balik rumah, I said to my mom and bro. They said it is normal for the learner to have that kinda "accident". Positive. Again! Alhamdulillah.

With all that disaster, akhirnya saya dapat menjalani ujian memandu with flying colours! Yay.. One of the greatest achievements in my life! But still, the heat of that tragedy still comes to my mind and stays. Apart from that, saya juga tak suka alam pemanduan. Is that the word? Just because I hate to be judged by people. And selalu dalam fikiran saya orang akan berkata buruk tentang saya sebab pemanduan saya...  Although saya insan bertuah ada kenderaan sendiri.. Yes, fear paralyzed me. And I refused to drive although I got plenty of time to have some fun and have some ride with my Encik Viva. 

There's a lot of detail that I wanted to write but it will be way to long. So I make it short. Saya sentiasa berdoa dan terus berdoa yang satu hari nanti saya akan jadi seorang pemandu yang cekap dan berhemah. It seems that saya tak akan bawa Encik Viva for my degree nanti.. Maybe... We'll see. Terima kasih kepada abanggggggg yang sentiasa jadi driver and my parents ofcoz! But abang.. dia rajin tunaikan destinasi yang saya nak tuju. My parents like "Suruh abang laa..".

My family dah banyak bising pasal benda ni.. Haha. Bila laa Masturah nak drive. My sister pun dah cakap jangan sampai Encik Viva ni dia yang pandu pulak!

And if you ever wondering yang my Encik Viva will left alone and dusty.. No. It got a lot of love where my bros and my parents drive it a lot as it auto and tini tiny and easy to ride. And I am happy with it.

Kenapa Fattytissue?

Assalamualaikum,

I did a few header.. But these two does not suit my template that good. #rejected header.

Saya tak nak tinggalkan blog ini dengan post yang sedih. So, Saya just nak kongsi sedikit sebanyak tentang kewujudan blog ni. Haha. Baru nak cerita.. Well, they said better late than never!

I started this blog when it was 2011, when I was 15. Saya dapat ilham dari Seri (SMKTDS) which is my new friend yang banyak menulis dalam blog tentang kehidupannya semasa di US. Seronok baca! She's just a wonderful yet beautiful girl :) I miss her. Anyways. Hehe. My first post bukan post yang ada sekarang ni. Saya dah save as draft. Ntahla. Cerita lama-lama saya memang merepek. Hoho. But now, saya dah banyak tapis entry-entry sebelum ni.. Termasuk post yang sekerat jalan punya cerita dan maybe entry kosong yang tersave ada 660 post total! Wow! Haha.. Sebenarnya Giveaways yang saya save as draft banyak gila!

random post yang tak dipublish! 

Active in 2013. Banyak enter giveaways and blogwalking. Masa ni Mariam laa yang membangkitkan semangat nak berblogging. Haha. Since she just made one for herself. My blog berkonsepkan diary, luahan hati, pendapat, pengalaman.. Something to do with myself, just MYSELF! I keep it public supaya orang yang macam saya or mengalami masalah macam saya dapat jumpa saya, I mean they're not alone. Erkk... Haha 

Back to main title! Fattytissue just random thought yang sampai ke otak saya. Dan saya berazam kalau saya ada blog saya nak url fattytissue.blogspot.com! Fattytissue it self actually nasty. Haha. geli kot. Tissue dalam badan. You can imagine those. Don't search the image of it. If not, I am not responsible if you just vomited in front of you computer/whatever it is. Not gonna lie.. Saya dah buat. Nearly puke. But gladly not. Or else if you just added ".blogspot.com" at the back of fattytissue which makes fattytissue.blogspot.com it will appear a cute, pink, girly website. Surely will make you better.. Hehe.

Blog saya pada mulanya hanya diketahui oleh orang-orang terdekat. Err.. tak bercadang untuk menyebarkan kepada sesiapa yang mengenali "watak utama" But.. Haha

At first my blog template is taylor swift! Then, I edited it slowly.. Yes not one day.. It may took me about a week or two. Zaman edit-mengedit ni memang tak habis. Bila rasa dah edit tu.. macam ada yang tak kena.. So memang hobi masa tu edit, photoshop-ing and doodling. Hehe. But lepas jea masuk asasi semua tu dah lenyap. No blog at all. Nak tumpukan perhatian with my study. Poyo pulak. Haha. Biasalah sekolah dulu sekolah biasa jea. So balik rumah boleh cerita keluh kesah. Kat PALAM dah laa internet tenat.. Masa takde. But kawan yang mendengar tu ramai.. So tak kesah sangat pun blog ni. 

Last edit masa tahun SPM tak silap.. Then, my brain dah tak ingat nak edit-edit dah.. And my template is not blogskin. Saya edit secara manual guna edit html. I am quiet impressed how my blog turns out. And tak ada future plan nak ubah lagi. Haha. Saya lebih selesa cerita kat blog. Sebab kadang-kadang tak semua cerita kita boleh cerita kat orang. Orang kan ada perasaan.. yang kadang-kadang secara tak sengaja kita terguris.. Blog ni bukan boleh record intosi suara. Haha, cuma tanda seru yang korang cuba buat andaian dari suara hati.. Haha. Haihh... Really, this blog banyak menyimpan kenangan. I am hoping will keep updating my online diary :) Adios.

Upu fasa 2...

Assalamualaikum,

Saya tak tahu nak sedih atau tiada rasa. Yang pasti bukan gembira. In shaa Allah. Redha ibubapa juga redha Allah, Masturah. The last time saya cerita pasal upu saya kemain kan? Semangat. Now I have no reason nak cerita dengan semangat. Saya cuba terima. And actually I am just fine.. just a little bit emotional plus period. So I am a little bit "over" than usual.

Ayah saya kata "Masturah switch pilihan kedua dengan pertama." Which means tukar farmasi jadi pilihan pertama instead of dietiation. I feel like what? I have to admit that I am sad. Hatiku luluh buat kali kedua. He said that farmasi is more umum while dietitian is specific which is study about diets, foods. He said, for future life better take farmasi. Peluang pekerjaan lebih luas.. I taught rezeki dimana-mana and Allah yang tentukan.. Saya cakap laa jugak why I did put dietitian as my first choice.. But then, I knew he know the best. So.. yea. I have to admit saya dah bayangkan how great it was belajar about dietitian. Which I really passion about. And I had my own reason why I choose farmasi as my second choice. Because, the requirement for farmasi is higher, 3.50. I know that I am ok with that. Just you know what I mean. 3.50 (uitm) ! Absolutely diorang pilih 4.00 flat.. And menghafal semua Biochemist yang tak sudah. Do you think it is fun? I don't know. Dietitian kat uitm pun senior haritu 3.90.. Huh..Saya diselubungi pelbagai emosi.

Tapi, Rezeki kita Allah yang tulis. Kalau Masturah memang ditetapkan dapat dietetik. Tak lari pun dietetik tu.. In shaa Allah. Yang penting doa tak putus. Saya tak ada perasaan marah pun. Cuma sedih.. Sebab saya dah banyak cerita kat kawan-kawan yang saya memang minat sangat dietetik.. Dan saya tahu ayah saya lebih arif.. 

Reunion 5SN2?

Assalamualaikum,

Semalam pada jam 11 malam Jo whatsapp ajak jumpa harini.. Well I though just us. Which commonly me, Jo, Mariam, Sha, Fara and others. Like girls day out like that. Surely I asked my parents permission right away since I miss my buddies. They said OK. I am happy then Jo started to say it is a class reunion.. Emm.. Haha.. Haha haaa... -___-" Pukul 11 malam tu jugak penubuhan group 5SN2 setelah sekian lama.. Haha. Then, rancak lah group itu. I have to say that I do really like the idea of reunion since we have lost contact since after 2 years I would say. Last minute perancangan. So it turns out to be 6 people that attend the "reunion".. Haha... Rasa berat nak pegi, but I really miss Jo. 

So yea. 11.30 am we've met. Me and Jojo give a warm hug sebab we miss each other so much. My study group partner :) Unfortunately My Mariam tak boleh hadir sebab ada majlis lain.. So saddddd. Kawan meja sebelah kot for a whole year. At first my father suruh drive.. Haha -____- Nope. Never happened. So, my bro hantar and amek. Our "Reunion" dekat jea ngan rumah. AEON Taman U. So the first hour just me and Jojo chit chat together. Jo, dia adalah kawan gelak tawa saya besides Najla. She just make me laugh and smile. I love her. Although kita berlainan agama and bangsa, she is christian and I really hope Jo dapat hidayah. But we both get along pretty good as saya murid baru kat sekolah tu.. Haha

Saya gembira spend masa dengan dia while tunggu yang lain.. Selepas the guys and Fara sampai we go to eat and talk about our updates.. Seriously.. After the guys came, I am not that comfortable since we faced each other pretty close since we sat at one table. It was awkward. Yet I push my chair little bit further than the table so I have some space to breathe. And I decided to go back early since yea.. Dah jumpa Jo dah cukup bermakna hari ni ngan Farahin. So yea.. Saya rasa ini adalah pertemuan terakhir with my few ex classmates. And not with Jo and the other girls ofcoz. They are totally fine for me.

I knew they gonna ask about my ring. Diorang tanya saya dah tunang ke.. I just leave that question unanswered because really.. Saya tak nak bagi harapan atau whatever thing you might think of. Time really change but not me and my stand. I am happy with what I had now. So please. 

Anyways, malasnya nak pi sekolah amek sijil SPM! 

My first Zalora experience

Assalamualaikum,

So, actually the package was sent to me by 19th of May. So yea.. I hope tak lambat untuk berkongsi how it goes.

It goes so well, from the picking till it sent to me. Sebab banyak kelebihan shopping kat sini berbanding yang lain

Apa yang saya suka dengan zalora adalah kerana saya boleh berbelanja dari rumah. Yes, I don't have that much oppurtunity to go shopping for myself. Harga berpatutan, banyak pilihan, penghantaran cepat, banyak discount code. So yeah.. I really enjoyed it so far yet my sisters pun want to give it a try. So, the second package just arrived this morning. 

Off topic, I just wondering that I am the oldest sister in my family yet I was the smallest. Is that make any sense? My shoe size was 36 yet my 16, 14 and 12 years old sister was 38. Haha, I have to admit that I was the only child in my family that a little bit "cuter" than the others. Yea.. But I liked it anyways :D